Topic of FAIL

[olopitekas]

nu jo. ale bet drasus, vistik. taip pagalvojau, neapsiimciau tampyt roguciu. bo paskui, jei kas, man ir atsakyt reiktu

[Marozas66]

kazkada mes ir panasiai davemes ir mentai uzmate susistabde ir sako rasom bauda, prasidejo derybos ''uz ka''? sakom ner juk taisyklese parasyta, kad negalima rogiu tampyt, tai jie nepasimete: negalima temt be atsvaitu ir t.t. ner stabdziu, avarinio zenklo oj pamenu juoko buvo klausant ju isminti

[Haris]

Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that b**ch knows I'm smarter than her.

[Falk3n]

Yra ir lietuviska versija

"As niekada nesupratau, kodel skiriasi vyru ir moteru seksualiniai poreikiai. As niekada nesupratau tu Marso ir Veneros istoriju. Ir kodel mes, vyrai, visada galvojam galva, o moterys sirdimi - to irgi niekada nesuprasdavau...Viena nakti, praeita savaite, As ir mano zmona nuejome i lova. Tai va, vos tik pradejome laisviau jaustis ir atsipalaiduoti, kaip tik TUO momentu ji pasake: "Man atrodo, As neturiu dabar jokio noro, As tik labai noriu, kad tu mane stipriai apkabintum." As pasakiau: "Ka???!!!" Ir tada ji pasake zodzius, kuriu bijo kiekvienas sios planetos vyras: "Tu negali suprasti mano, kaip moters emociniu poreikiu". As pradejau galvoti, kad esu netikes vyras. Galu gale supratau, kad sia nakti nieko nebeivyks ir uzmigau. Kita sestadieni mes nuejome kartu apsipirkti.Didziuliame prekybos centre mano zmona susirado tris sukneles, kurios jai patiko. Kol ji jas matavosi, as nuejau apsidairyti. Kai grizau, ji vis dar nebuvo nusprendusi, kuria noretu nusipirkti. Taigi as pasiuliau jai pasiimti visas tris. Ji uzsimine, kad dabar prie viso to jai reiketu poros tinkamu batu. As jai pasakiau, kad tai butu visai gera ideja. Viskas baigesi tuo, kad mes dar nuejome i juvelyrine ir issirinkome kelis deimantinius auskarus. Ji buvo tokia laiminga ir susijaudinusi! Ji greiciausiai galvojo, kad as esu isprotejes, bet neatrode, kad tai ja gasdintu ar neramintu. Manau, kad ji norejo mane patikrinti, kai pasiule prie viso to slamsto dar ir teniso raketes nupirkti, nors ji teniso aplamai nezaide. Manau, As visiskai suklaidinau jos nuomone apie mane, kai tam kuo nuolankiausiai pritariau. Ji buvo beveik seksualiai susijaudinusi. Butumet mate jos veida, kai ji pasake: "Gal einame i kasa susimoketi?" Man nebuvo taip lengva susikaupti ir jai papriestarauti: "Ne, brangioji, As kazkaip praradau nora visa tai pirkti." Butumet jus mate jos veida! Ji isbalo kaip kreida. As dar priduriau: "As tik noreciau, kad tu mane stipriai apkabintum" Ta akimirka, kai ji i mane paziurejo lyg butu norejusi mane uzmusti, dar spejau pasiskusti: "Tu negali suprasti mano, kaip vyro, finansiniu poreikiu"."

[NASA]

Putin fail:



Chinese fail:

[Wytska]

Yra ir lietuviska versija

"As niekada nesupratau, kodel skiriasi vyru ir moteru seksualiniai poreikiai. As niekada nesupratau tu Marso ir Veneros istoriju. Ir kodel mes, vyrai, visada galvojam galva, o moterys sirdimi - to irgi niekada nesuprasdavau...Viena nakti, praeita savaite, As ir mano zmona nuejome i lova. Tai va, vos tik pradejome laisviau jaustis ir atsipalaiduoti, kaip tik TUO momentu ji pasake: "Man atrodo, As neturiu dabar jokio noro, As tik labai noriu, kad tu mane stipriai apkabintum." As pasakiau: "Ka???!!!" Ir tada ji pasake zodzius, kuriu bijo kiekvienas sios planetos vyras: "Tu negali suprasti mano, kaip moters emociniu poreikiu". As pradejau galvoti, kad esu netikes vyras. Galu gale supratau, kad sia nakti nieko nebeivyks ir uzmigau. Kita sestadieni mes nuejome kartu apsipirkti.Didziuliame prekybos centre mano zmona susirado tris sukneles, kurios jai patiko. Kol ji jas matavosi, as nuejau apsidairyti. Kai grizau, ji vis dar nebuvo nusprendusi, kuria noretu nusipirkti. Taigi as pasiuliau jai pasiimti visas tris. Ji uzsimine, kad dabar prie viso to jai reiketu poros tinkamu batu. As jai pasakiau, kad tai butu visai gera ideja. Viskas baigesi tuo, kad mes dar nuejome i juvelyrine ir issirinkome kelis deimantinius auskarus. Ji buvo tokia laiminga ir susijaudinusi! Ji greiciausiai galvojo, kad as esu isprotejes, bet neatrode, kad tai ja gasdintu ar neramintu. Manau, kad ji norejo mane patikrinti, kai pasiule prie viso to slamsto dar ir teniso raketes nupirkti, nors ji teniso aplamai nezaide. Manau, As visiskai suklaidinau jos nuomone apie mane, kai tam kuo nuolankiausiai pritariau. Ji buvo beveik seksualiai susijaudinusi. Butumet mate jos veida, kai ji pasake: "Gal einame i kasa susimoketi?" Man nebuvo taip lengva susikaupti ir jai papriestarauti: "Ne, brangioji, As kazkaip praradau nora visa tai pirkti." Butumet jus mate jos veida! Ji isbalo kaip kreida. As dar priduriau: "As tik noreciau, kad tu mane stipriai apkabintum" Ta akimirka, kai ji i mane paziurejo lyg butu norejusi mane uzmusti, dar spejau pasiskusti: "Tu negali suprasti mano, kaip vyro, finansiniu poreikiu"."

prastas vertimas...

[Falk3n]

prastas vertimas...

bet tiems kam sunkiau su anglu tai ir toks gerai

[tomarinas]

[Kennyy]

Tomarino Fail Balta foto

[ZND007]

Gal daug kas jau mate, bet cia tai failas
du viename - Jis gejus ir buciuojas su moterim ir dar ta nuotrauka isvis failas

[NASA]

Jei jau buvo Putino fail'as, tai politkorektiskumo vardan - Bush fail

[laprix]

Gal daug kas jau mate, bet cia tai failas
du viename - Jis gejus ir buciuojas su moterim ir dar ta nuotrauka isvis failas

Ten plaukas kiek iziuriu nu gal kartais ir apsiseilejo.....

[NASA]

ten mikrafas

kad nebutu offtopic

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+
Greenpeace FAIL

[Wytska]

pas ta ant nugaros parasyta "HOMO"

[Riebus]

pas ta ant nugaros parasyta "HOMO"

ten fotke mirorinta